what a lousy lousy lousy day. boooo.
i know i shldn't be saying this since it'll bring 4 years of

bad luck to me. but, somehow. my brain ain't gonna listen

to my inner dialogue. so.. haisssss..... =(

nothing seems right in whatever things i do.

why so.. i hate that feeling of being nothing but a hassle..

i hate that to core.. as much as i wish to pull myself through

this aimless journey, there's always setbacks coming in between

that withdraw me back and forcing me to retreat from the world.

im tired. i really am. how much more do i have to endure when

everything comes to no avail.. i hate all those weaknesses of mine.

i do wish to prove to mum that the word fated doesn't exist at all.

but probably i shld reckon it now. probably i shld submit to the life that

im given. no no no.. i shldn't let auto thoughts get into my way. they are

nothing but negative thoughts. i should listen to my inner dialogue instead.

be strong. hang on. all will be fine. hurdles are something that allows us to

.....................................................become stronger. yes. thats the way. i hate that loneliness feeling.

its gonna to be tough through, and alone but fear not.

your guardian star and angel must be somewhere guiding you along..

.

.

.

下雨了站在玻璃门里头
并没有总是挂念着我
你带着雨伞来接我
夜晚了只剩老板跟我
像从前你抽着烟皱眉头

不知怎么安抚太任性的我
本来不觉得你特别疼我
直到你不再疼爱我以后
已经过去雨伞和雨衣
不会再庇护我
本来不觉得你特别疼我
直到你不再疼我以后
来不及了
手写的留言对象
已经不会是我

.

停雨了不必再躲雨了
已经过了该打烊的时候
还是不太想走
太晚了只能坐计程车
为什么想念着摩托车
常常会半路熄火的后座
本来不觉得你特别疼我
直到你放弃爱我以后
已经过去雨伞和雨衣
不会再庇护我
本来不觉得你特别疼我
直到你不再疼我以后
来不及了
长长的简讯对象
已经不会是我

.

走在湿漉漉红砖道上
沿着导盲砖试着假装
的确有点困难
也许我就这样走路回家
反正你不再在乎几点
该几点回到家
本来不觉得你特别疼我
直到你再也不疼我以后
已经过去雨伞和雨衣
不会再保护我
本来不觉得你特别疼我
直到你放弃爱我以后
来不及了
对不起长大太慢
害你遗失了我
抱歉让你白费了这么多

..

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

Do you know what it's like
To feel so in the dark
To dream about a life
Where you're the shining star
Even though it seems
Like it's too far away
I have to believe in myself
It's the only way

Hello people, my name is yingxuan. you can call me xing yuan if you want to. =) i love my family and friends. Chocolates are my fav esp nama chocs from royce and kinder bueno! I love kids in particular to a 5 year old one who is simply so adorable and i heart him to the max! thats all about it. thank you.